It’s been a while since my last blog post in April, but life gets pretty hectic at times, and I became spread a little thin and all over the place. But even these challenging times have a lesson or two in them and I have taken some time out from work to consolidate, refocus and move forward in some of the more important areas of my life. And my health and wellness has become an extremely important value to me over the last six months.
That doesn’t mean, however, that it’s all been easy sailing. There have been some stormy waters to navigate both personally and professionally, and this makes living in a calorie deficit, still adapting to strength training and trying to develop strong, life-changing habits around nutrition and fitness, really trying and frustrating on some days.
Since my last post, I have continued to work with Alex on flexible dieting and strength training, and I have made more progress…I’m almost 21 kilograms down (fifteen of them since starting with Alex in January) and have lost 73 centimetres (in my waist, thigh and hips). Alex keeps assuring me that the results are what he’s looking for even though I would like things to be happening a bit quicker! I guess that’s the kind of unhealthy pressure I tend to put on myself.
And this is something I am also focusing on at the moment, my mindset, which I am trying to change from outcomes- to process-driven. So this week, following Alex’s advice, I have decided to take a diet break for seven days (my daily calories will increase from 1,600 to 2,000) and I have agreed NOT to weigh myself the entire week. I am also trying to understand and action the idea of moderating my gym workouts…not trying to always push myself to my personal limits… And that’s a tricky one. My black- and white-thinking (which I am constantly trying to break) makes it difficult to dance in the grey areas of sometimes it’s okay to not be able to give it 110%.
And these are my new lessons as I head to the six-month mark. When I look at the progress photos which visually remind me that I am moving forward, I see a HUGE CHANGE from where I started at 101kgs in September last year. I need to be more self-loving, kinder and gentler with myself, because this is not the end and there is a way to go to get to where I want to be. I need to stay focused, but be prepared to consider the ideas of moderation and long-term outcomes a little more, while truly embodying the learning, knowledge and principles that I have been introduced to over the past 180 days.
This week’s plan is to take a deep breath, give myself the love and credit I deserve, and let myself explore and experiment a little more with uncertainty around my thoughts, ideas and behaviours that are being (emotionally) pushed at the moment. I am going to see it as adventure into unknown territory, without a scale, but a lot of trust and openness to how this might be good for me in the long-run. After all, maybe it is time for me to colour outside the “dieting” lines a bit more…
Written by: Leigh-Anne Brierley